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01.24.12
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Advice: When Hotels Aren’t Welcoming
When a gay couple isn’t treated like the straight guests, it isn’t always obvious. Is it better to let the slight slide or to speak up?
By Steven Petrow
Question: My boyfriend and I recently spent some time at a really nice little inn in the Smoky Mountains. One nice touch is a blackboard in the foyer that welcomes all the guests, in alphabetical order. There were about 15 married couples on the board (like “Sather, Lucy and Bill”), but Jerry and I were listed separately – and not even near each other because of the alphabetization. We were clearly a couple. I had made the reservation in both of our names, for a room with a queen bed. I wanted to complain immediately, but Jerry didn’t want to make a scene. Weeks later, I’m still upset – mostly with the inn, but a little with Jerry, too. Don’t you think I was right?
Answer: Yes, I think you’re right to be upset. It’s insulting to be treated as if your relationship were less important or less valid than other couples. Although I understand Jerry’s not wanting to risk causing a scene, sometimes it’s important to stand up for yourselves – and for other gay couples – by speaking up. That doesn’t mean being rude, since a quiet word can be more effective than a shouting match, but it does mean making the point, firmly, that you expect to be treated like all the other coupled guests.
Hotels have been particularly tricky for gay couples. Many befuddled desk clerks have offered to “correct” reservations made for a queen or king bed when faced with two men or two women checking in, and it can be awkward at best to have to correct the correction. Hotel employees are rarely openly hostile to their guests, but they can be silently judgmental (or inadvertently discourteous) due to their own discomfort. Friend and writer Eric Marcus (What If Someone I Know Is Gay?) tells of a recent experience checking into a small hotel with his partner of 17 years, where the desk clerk greeted him and completely ignored his partner. As he explained to me: “Indeed, however seemingly small the oversight, it didn't feel small to us and it made us feel less than welcome.”
The small slights pale in comparison with cases of outright bias, like the gay couple turned away from a U.K. hotel in 2010 because of their sexual orientation, or the lesbian couple who were refused a booking for their wedding by the Wildflower Inn in Vermont. The British couple took their case to court and won; the thwarted brides filed suit and await a ruling. One of the brides-to-be explained, “We might not have only a right but a duty to speak up about it. It wasn’t just about us. It was preventing other people from having the same negative experience around what should be such a positive life marker.”
That’s why it’s important to speak up. Every slight or insult is also an opportunity to effect change. But what do you do in the moment? To address the chalkboard issue wouldn’t require raising the pride flag (or, for that matter, your voice). In fact, it’s always best to start by assuming there’s been a simple mistake that can be easily rectified. In your case, you could have said: “Perhaps you didn’t realize that Jerry and I are a couple, and we’d prefer to be listed that way along with the others.” If the clerk couldn’t or wouldn’t make the change, you could ask to speak to the manager.
READ FULL ARICLE HERE: www.advocate.com/Arts_and_Entertainment/Commentary/Advice_When_Hotels_Arent_Welcoming/
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01.01.12
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Same-Sex Marriages Legal in Cancun
Gay travelers just got another reason to head to the Caribbean. According to Fox News Latino, Cancun, Cozumel, and other resort areas in the Mexican Caribbean will soon allow same-sex couples to legally marry, thanks largely to a recently discovered quirk in the local civil code.
The area is already popular with LGBT travelers from the U.S., Europe, Canada, and other parts of Mexico, and several couples have already expressed interest in marrying there. Activist Patricia Novelo told the Spanish language news site Efe.com that the first same-sex group weddings will be held in the resort area this month. The International Gay and Lesbian Travel Association is working with Colectivo Diversidad, Fusion G, and Gay Tours Mexico to strike up deals with airlines and hotel chains so that same-sex weddings can be held all along Mexico's Caribbean coast.
According to Fox News Latino, same-sex marriages are possible in the region of Mexico known as Quintana Roo, "thanks to a legal gap in the Civil Code," which speaks only to "people interested in getting married" without specifying their gender.
Mexico City already has legal same-sex marriage; over 1,200 same-sex couples have married there so far.
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12.25.11
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Gay-Owned Ace Hotel Chain Expands to L.A., CA
The newest Ace Hotel will take shape in an 85-year-old Los Angeles theater and office tower built by Charlie Chaplin and Mary Pickford.
The Ace chain, viewed as hip and urbane, was begun by three gay men in 1999. Alex Calderwood, Wade Weigel, and Doug Herrick successfully turned a Seattle halfway house into a destination hotel before opening properties in Portland, Ore., Manhattan, and Palm Springs. Many of the hotels are frequented by celebrities, media, and LGBT patrons.
The newest Ace will open at the historic United Artists building on Broadway in downtown Los Angeles, the site of rapid gentrification in the last decade. The Hollywood Reporter notes that the beautiful Spanish Gothic structure was erected with support from Hollywood luminaries like Chaplin, Pickford, Douglas Fairbanks, and D.W. Griffith. There is hope that the new operators will restore the building's 2,214 seat theater, recently used as a church, to its former glory.
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12.24.11
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The Top 20 Gayest Destinations in the USA
Even if you’re one of the 85% who have a passport sometimes you need to give it a rest. Does that mean stop travelling? Hell no! Does that mean we’re keeping it quotidian? Not necessarily. The results from Community Marketing Inc’s 16th Annual LGBT Tourism Study are in, which means a whole bunch of cities are out. Just who made the list of the Top 20 Most Popular Leisure Destinations last year amongst the gays?
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12.13.11
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Aspen Gay Ski Week celebrates 35 years
Aspen Gay Ski Week, the nation’s largest and oldest gay ski event, will celebrate its 35th anniversary January 15-22, 2011. This year the presenting sponsor is Bud Light, and proceeds from the event will benefit GLSEN (the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network), the Trevor Project, the Point Foundation, and the local program TEACH (Teachers Empowering Agents of Change), the Western Colorado AIDS Project, the Gender Identity Center of Colorado, as well as local schools of the Roaring Fork Valley.
"With the theme 'Through the Years,' this year's gay ski week will embrace our beginnings thirty-five years ago in 1977," remarked Bryan Gonzales, co-producer of Aspen Gay Ski Week and program director of Roaring Fork Gay and Lesbian Community Fund. "World-famous Aspen plays host to a week of epic skiing, après ski events at the Limelight Lodge, exciting nightly events and the popular downhill costume competition."
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11.13.11
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NYC’s First Gay Hotel Was Long Time in Planning
Manhattan’s newest gay neighborhood, Hell’s Kitchen, is getting The Out NYC. It’s New York City’s first gay hotel and, perhaps, the only gay urban resort in the country, according to developer Ian Reisner, managing partner of Parkview Developers. Reisner and his business partners own other properties in New York State.
The idea came from a gay-focused boutique hotel in Barcelona where Reisner stayed a few years ago. He decided New York City needed a similar hotel and, in fact, an entire entertainment complex.
It makes sense considering that, despite higher-profile gay-centric locations, New York is the top travel destination for both gay and lesbian travelers, reports Community Marketing, a San Francisco-based company that specializes in LGTB travel research.
"This is an idea whose time has come,” says Reisner. “What makes The Out NYC a gay hotel is the comfort level and tailored amenities for the community. The Out NYC will become a 'can't-miss' for gay tourists as well as the epicenter of gay life for LGBT New Yorkers."
The hotel complex — an adapted 1950s-vintage, drive-in motor inn — is situated on 42nd St. between 10th and 11th Avenues. A major rehabilitation and redirected use of the existing motel will turn the property into a 105-room boutique hotel with a spa, wellness center, business center and conference rooms. The entertainment complex includes the 11,000-square-foot XL nightclub, lounge and cabaret as well as a 24/7 café and a restaurant called Kitchen.
“It feels like a hotel in Miami,” describes Reisner. “All rooms are on the second floor and higher, facing an internal courtyard."
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11.10.11
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Miami's gay hotel makes quantum leap for the gay traveller.
Located at Miami’s South Beach, the new accommodation block has been praised for making a “quantum leap in gay travel”, offering its guests a relaxed and cool environment complete with Cha Cha bars and Liza Minnelli posters.
With plans to launch the chain in New York, Los Angeles, Las Vegas and San Francisco owner Brian Gorman told the Gawker that the concept came after surveying 20,000 gay Americans and found that they would opt to stay in a gay oriented hotel over other options.
He added that from its conception his aim was the build a hotel that would relax guests with its fun environment.
“You know, so many products in the boutique world are about 'We're so cool that, like, if you want to walk into the lobby, you have to put on the sunglasses, instead of taking them off,” Mr Gorman said.
“What I wanted was a place where people would come and automatically be disarmed by the design.”
According to Mr Gorman, the hotel was constructed within four months, a short period to avoid over thinking the product.
“I think more time makes for an overdesigned, over thought product, whereas what we did was from the gut,” he concluded.
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10.07.11
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Spain's Pink-Painted Gay Village in jeopardy?
A project to turn a village in Spain into a gay mecca by painting all the homes pink, renaming the streets after gay artists, and even designating a park specifically for outdoor sex has been met with opposition, reports Passport magazine.
The ambitious project, conceived by gay entrepreneur Javier Checa, would entail painting all of the 300 houses located in the Pueblo Blanco enclave of Moclinejo, Spain, pink. Checa says he wanted to create another Ibiza, where gay people could "walk around free and do what they want."
Moclinejo's town hall approved the building of 50 gay-designated houses but prohibited the painting of any of the houses or streets pink. Checa disagreed with the housing plans, saying that "building 50 houses will not make this a destination for gays; I am gay and I know what the community needs."
“It is discriminatory and segregates people for purely political and economic reasons,” says Salvador Rubio, president of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Collective.
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10.05.11
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Lesbian Couple Say They Were Kicked Out of Hotel for Kissing
Two women are claiming discrimination after they were repeatedly asked to leave the rooftop pool at the St. Louis Four Seasons — even though it appears that they were allowed to remain at the site until closing time.
According to local News Channel 5, Teresa Folds and her girlfriend, Juleigh Snell, say they were harassed by hotel staff after kissing in the Jacuzzi.
Folds says she and Snell were approached by a hotel security officer and told they were not allowed to kiss on the property. When they asked to speak to a manager, they were told that even heterosexual couples were not allowed to kiss on the property.
“When we were explaining how gay people have rights, he basically insinuated that we were not a normal couple and should not be kissing,” says Snell.
The couple says the manager told them their inappropriate behavior had resulted in complaints, but that they were not given specifics on what behavior had been deemed inappropriate.
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09.18.11
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Gay Resort planned in Wilton Manors draws ire from residents!
This seems to be the most unlikely title about an article about Wilton Manors. In a city that prides itself on being an alternative lifestyle and gay friendly neighborhood, how can it be that a gay resort is being resisted..strongly?
Well it seems that just like many other problems that face us in the US these days, it comes down to the almighty dollar. Many of the residents in the area of the proposed five-star, gay-oriented resort feel that the development would increase noise and traffic and …wait for it…decrease property values.
You know, they must hand out brochures at anti-development meetings. I have been involved with scores of city commission and special master hearings on everything from shopping malls to night clubs and invariably the same old tired arguments get raised…like clockwork.
Noise, Traffic, and Declining Property Values.
Yet, it seems they, the opponents, can never seem to substantiate their claims. They just seem to love the squeaky wheel chatter that they make and in small towns like Wilton Manors, their voices get a forum. Which they most assuredly should have…to a point.
The $60 million G Resort is proposed to open by 2012 on the site of the Center for Spiritual Living church, a stone’s throw from homes in eastern Wilton Manors.
Read story here: www.robinashley.com/tag/gay-resort-in-wilton-manors/
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